Monday, November 24, 2003

Ninja Fucking Robots

All right, so I was going to make this one of the links of the day yesterday, but I think that this is so damn freaky that it needs its own post. I'm pretty sure the fate of the world is at stake with this one, and I'm the only one who sees it. So, here is what I am talking about...



That's right, that's a ninja fucking robot. Actually, that particular one is a sumo wrestling robot, which is also quite scary. Here's the article about them if you don't believe me. There's also some movies of these badasses in action. Granted, they don't look too tough yet, but it's only stage one.

The only logical conclusion from seeing these things is that they will be taking over the world soon. I mean, how can us measly humans compete with ninja robots?!?! All it will take is for one of them to "learn" to be pissed off at us, and it's all over. Some of you may be asking why I'm so scared. Well, ninjas scare the shit out of me. Here's why. Now, instead of ninja, substitute ninja fucking robot. Hey, now you see why I'm scared, don't ya?

So what options do us petty humanoids have? Well, my only frame of reference on this sort of thing, sadly, is the Matrix. The first Matrix, not the shitty second one or the third one that I assume is even more shitty. So I suppose we need to blow up the sun and dig to the center of the earth to create a city. Okay, scratch that, do the first part second and the second part first. See, that type of quick thinking is why I should be the king of the new underground world that we will soon enjoy. Vote King Shaun in 2020. Hell, at least it won't be so fucking cold in the middle of the earth. See that?!?! Feels like four degrees here. Bullshit, I tell ya.

On a completely unrelated note, I woke up to a city inspector in my house. After a few people died in a housefire a few months ago, they are now inspecting all the houses in Dinkytown. While that was a tragedy in all seriousness, I still don't want to get booted from my house. See, Tim and I don't have what are exactly considered legal windows in our room. In fact, they aren't really windows at all. They're more like slabs of foot thick glass that has no way of opening. And I think the fire dude probably noticed that. Our only hope is that our landlord paid the guy off. Otherwise, I think I'm out the door. So faithful readers in the U of M area, if you are looking for a roommate or two, you know where to reach us. Our other plan is to live with Tim's parents for a while, which would be weird, or get an apartment, which would be expensive. Actually, the real plan is to tell them to lower our rent and say we'll move out, but never do. But that's one to keep on the dl, not post on the... shit.

Oh, and since none of you bastards decided to help me put my MSN link up, I had to learn how to do it myself. Actually, I owe Spuggy of GorillaMask a little credit, he actually talked me through how to do it. But I don't owe any of you other pricks anything! Thanks for nothing, you ungrateful assholes! Wait... I didn't mean it, I'm sorry, I love you, please keep reading our site!!! Wow, it's official, I'm a schitzoid. Oh well, on to...

LINKS OF THE DAY


This guy is damn cool. Or he's a complete fake. Either way, he's my fucking hero.

Triumph the Insult Comic Dog Music Video... need I say more? It's pretty funny, watch it if you're on high speed.





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