Wednesday, January 21, 2004

Total Randomness...

All right, so changing for the New Year didn't work so hot. I still am a huge fatass, even after the tons of methamphetamines that Marshall suggested I take for weight loss. Now I just really like to stay awake for days at a time. I had to quit that though, sadly, meth is easier to get in Crankton, er, Yankton, than it is in Minneapolis. I'm still totally fucking lazy, and have only been moderately successful in following my new years lifting program.

So, like every semester of college I've ever taken, I've decided to turn over a new leaf with some new classes. I think I'm giong to be more realisitic this time around though. I resolve to go to at least 2/3 of my classes, upping my average by a good third. I resolve to lift at least three times a week, which could theoretically be possible. I also plan on giving up a certain nasty habit that shall remain nameless because I was never addicted in the first place, damn it. Yeah, it's not masturbation fuckstains, keep your heads out of the gutter. I'll never quit that anyway.

However, I'm also going to resolve fun stuff, like updating Goldy's Mom on a more regular basis. I also plan on partying even harder on the weekends than we did last semester, because that's what Wubbs and I do best, beause we just fucking rule.

I guess I already took the first step of improving my life by no longer looking like a damn dirty bum. Yes, that's right, I finally got a haircut. Our roommate Mike is missing his true calling by not just being a hair stylist for the rest of his life. He also gave me these wicked ass shaped sideburns that I won't be able to keep in the cool shape for very long. Damn it all. Anyway, look for pictures of us out partying with me and my sexy hair. And girls, I know it will be tough, but keep your hands off me please... hahahahaha, just kidding, harass me all you want... please.

Otherwise, not much new to report. Wubbs gave you the weekend update in fine fashion. I hate freezing my testicles off every time I go outdoors. And we have Rufus, by far the coolest roommate we've ever had. All of you that live anywhere close must come to play beer pong with us, and sign Rufus with something witty. My addition? "This is the best idea Wubbs and I ever had... that's sad."

Next update will definitely include a hockey game, and we'll all be intoxicated so it'll be a good time. Until then, all I have is...

The Links of the Day


Smack the Penquin, this game rules. 315.5 is my record.

Watch out! The RIAA is still after you. Turn your file sharing off and you're safe.

Wubbs' new dog looks something like this.


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